If You Only Knew
by EllieBranstone
Summary: Cordelia was the winner of the 69th Hunger Games and when she is chosen to become a prostitute she turns to Finnick for help. She realizes that she's falling in love with him but after the 70th Hunger Games she sees how much he loves Annie and 'breaks up' with him so he could be with Annie.


**I don't own the Hunger Games in anyway shape or form. The only character I own throughout this whole fanfiction is my own character; Cordelia Ackers. She is based on my role-playing character and something I have worked hard at the year I have had her so please don't try stealing any ideas or anything about her. I would hate to see another me wondering around on the site.**

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"_You're parents look like sweet people," _Cordelia could feel her fists clenching the table as she watched President Snow walking around her house. She had finally gotten fully moved from her parent's house to the Victor's Village and she had been alone when President Snow showed up. That had been the first sign that was something was wrong but she had tried ignoring it. She had already done exactly what he wanted. She had played in his dumb Games and not only that but she had won those Games. _"It would be a terrible shame if anything should happen to them, correct?"_ he asked her turning back around to face her. Cordelia knew he was hinting at something but she couldn't be sure what it was. _"Yes I would be lost without them…" _she said before noticing his smirk widen and she knew that she had said the wrong answer. _"And we wouldn't want the Capitol's new favorite to be lost. You certainly made an impression on many of my citizens. They all are asking me when the mermaid from District Four plans on making her return to us." _ Now she could see where this was leading. He just wanted her to come back to the Capitol for a few parties and that she could actually do. Even as much as she hated the Capitol if it would protect her family she would go to the end of the Earth. _"We have even had quite a few bidding on who gets you first." _ He said watching her face fall as he spoke. He hated when someone thought they had gotten the upper hand against him._ "What do you mean who gets me first?" "Oh yes now I have your attention. Perhaps you should go ask your mentor what I mean. I expect you both to be in the Capitol tomorrow evening." _He put the picture down before walking out of the house.

Cordelia felt her anger raising as she wanted nothing more than to chase him down and punch him just once in the face as hard as she could. But she kept her temper in check as best she could; though the vase broken into a million little pieces on the floor begged to differ_. 'That presumptuous prick.'_ She muttered under her breath as she walked out the back door slamming it loudly as she headed up toward Finnick's house every word that she mumbled on the way up there some type of curse word or something she wished to do to President Snow. He knew exactly where she was vulnerable and would do anything to protect her family no matter what it took, even if it involved whatever she had to talk to Finnick about. There could be nothing worse than the nightmares she endured thanks to the Games. She hated knowing she had been the one to kill innocent children, she stopped in her tracks taking a deep breath, they weren't innocent. She had to keep reminding herself that they weren't as innocent as children should be. If she hadn't killed them then surely they would have killed her. She started walking again this time even faster than the first time. What more could he want from her? Had she not already given her soul to the Capitol?

She stopped short of Finnick's house seeing him standing on the porch talking with a dark haired girl and she smiled softly; Annie. It was rather adorable the way he protected her. It was almost brotherly but she wondered how long until he saw the truth. It was plan to everyone around them that Annie cared for him more than a brother and she was sure he would eventually grow to feel the same way about her as well. It was impossible not to. It was impossible for anyone to hate Annie to be exact. She was a sweet girl who never wished to harm anyone. Cordelia shook her head hoping that Annie's name was never drawn from Reaping. She loved the girl dearly but she didn't expect to be able to survive the Games. Annie was always the type of girl that no one wished to see in the Games. She was a good natured soul and Cordelia honestly wondered if she could handle the whole aspect of killing someone. Cordelia had known when she went into the Games that she thought killing was bad but during the Games another part of your soul comes out and its survival of the fittest. She watched as Annie hugged him before skipping off the porch heading toward Cordelia now. A forced smile came on her lips as Annie rushed to give her a hug _"Oh Cordi I didn't notice you there. Be careful Mr. Odair is in a grumpy mood today." _She said with a laugh_ "It seems President Snow came to visit him and now he bites the head off anyone who talks to him." _She said before smiling sweetly at the blonde girl _"I've got to go. Mom is waiting for me to go shopping!"_ she said skipping further down the beach heading toward the entrance of the Victor's Village.

She glanced up where Finnick was standing and noticed him looking at her. She watched him closely noticing his shoulders slumping almost as in defeat before he waved her up. She walked up this time not as quickly as before. Of course she wished to know what was going on but there was a part of her that wanted to run away from Finnick's, from District Four, from Panem altogether. She took a deep breath reminding herself that it would just leave her parents unprotected and would probably end in their death which she didn't want to think about. She climbed up the stairs but before she could open her mouth Finnick shushed her ushering her into the house. _"This isn't something you want to broadcast in case anyone is coming up this way." _He said softly taking a seat on the couch staring into fireplace. _"You know the reason everyone is alive in my life still and why Haymitch drinks so much anymore…" _She didn't answer him because she knew that's not what he was asking her for. It was more a statement than an actual question. She leaned against the door frame looking at his back as he sighed. _"I gave in to President Snow. I won the games and thought I had escaped but they still own me. Haymitch, he fought against the Games. He won by making a mockery of them. Then when they asked him for his decision he snubbed them. Within days his family and his beloved was dead. All ordered by President Snow." _Cordelia let out a gasp putting her hand up to her mouth in shock. She couldn't believe that President Snow… she thought about it for a moment actually she realized it was exactly something he would do. _"Now," _Finnick turned around looking at her _"you're being given the same choice. You can be like me or you can be like Haymitch." _He said and Cordelia could see the pain in his eyes as he spoke those words to her.

She took a deep breath walking over sitting beside him placing her hands on his knees _"My family means the world to me. I told you during the Games that the only reason I wanted to win was because of them. I'm not going to let them down now…" _She offered him a soft forced smile. She hated the thought of having to sell her body to the freaks in the Capitol and something that made her cringe even more was that she wasn't even going to be able to choose her suitors. Instead it would be the highest bidder that Snow thought he needed to ally himself with. She had heard that some of the victors offered their body for services but she had always thought it had been their choice but she understood differently now. None of them had chosen that lifestyle instead it had been forced upon them. She glanced at the fire before feeling a heat rise in her cheeks as she avoided Finnick's eyes _"I won't know what to do." "Don't worry they will show you exactly what they wish for you to do," _was the answer she had received from Finnick. _"No I mean I won't literally know what to do." _As if a sudden light bulb went off over Finnick's head and she could feel his stare on the side of her face. _"Are you telling me you have never been with a male before?" _He asked her in a shocked tone. Cordelia nodded slowly feeling her face turn an even darker red color than it already was. It wasn't that she hadn't ever had the chance but none of the guys felt right to her. She wanted something special; she wanted her first time to be with someone she thought she loved or at least knew she cared about dearly. Instead it was looking like her first time would be with a stranger.

She didn't notice that Finnick had moved until she felt him tipping her chin so she was looking at him. _"You're a very beautiful woman. Why has no man tried making love to you?" _He asked still not able to understand how Cordelia was a virgin. _"It's not that they haven't tried. I just wanted something different for my first time. I have seen girls under the piers with boys and I could tell they enjoyed it but I didn't want a few stolen kisses and useless thrusting for my first time. I thought it would be with my husband or the man I planned on marrying." _She shook her head _"It sounds so silly now. It seems my first time will be the furthest thing from special-" _her voice was cut off by Finnick pressing his lips against her own. She couldn't understand what was going on around her. The only thing she knew for sure was that she felt her stomach knotting up in butterflies as he deepened the kiss running his tongue along her bottom lip. She felt a sigh escape her lips as he pulled away both of them breathing heavily. _"I'm so sorry about that, Cordi." _He said shaking his head unsure of what had made him kiss the girl in front of him. He just knew he hated the idea of another man touching her or being with her first. She would never get any passion from them and he knew that when the time came she would become even bitterer than she would be already. He wanted to give her something to remind her that not all men were pigs and planned on just using her. All Cordelia could do was nod as she stared into his eyes curiosity showing through her own. She bit her bottom lip before leaning forward kissing him once again.


End file.
